David Copperfield is one hard-working guy.
He tours constantly and when he's not on the road, he's
planning or rehearsing for the next leg of his never-ending world-tour.
We often wondered how he kept up the pace. How he stayed perpetually young. We also had questions about how he does that
trick where he lasers off half his body and walks down a platform.
We have answered one of the two questions.
According to the very reliable Australian
Broadcast Company's news feed, Mr. Copperfield has found "The Fountain
of Youth."
We have broken with the stylistic requirements by referring
to the object as "The Fountain of Youth." The New York Times Manual of Style requires
any use of this phrase be in conjunction "with the arbitrary and wholly
unnecessary modifier 'proverbial.'" (27 Edition, pp. 235-236). If in fact Mr. Copperfield has found this long-sought
pool of eternal life, that's good enough for us and takes it out of the
"proverbial" category.
His little pool of perpetual personhood is located in the
southern Bahamas,
amid a cluster of four tiny islands he recently bought for $50,000,000.
(By the way, you can rent his private resort on Musha Cay
for a mere $300,000.00 a week. That's
more than we make in a month from our ads on Quinlan's Inside Magic).
"I've discovered a true phenomenon," Mr.
Copperfield said. "You can take
dead leaves, they come in contact with the water, they become full of life
again. Bugs or insects that are near death come in contact with the water,
they'll fly away."
We agree with Mr. Copperfield this "is an amazing
thing, very, very exciting."
We question whether there is a need to revive leaves and
bugs. But Mr. Copperfield knows what he
is doing.
He was once engaged to Claudia Schiffer – we've never even had Ms. Schiffer return our
phone-calls or emails or singing telegrams or sky-writing or inflatable
character messaging or flaming arrow with message attached. To be fair, though, the flaming arrow
probably wasn't the best way of communicating with the Super Model.
The crime scene investigator said once the
fire went out, the message was burned up pretty badly. Who wants to sift through still-warm embers
to discern a message from an archer with a horrible aim and apparently
inadequate personal liability insurance?
Mr. Copperfield says he has hired biologists and geologists
"to examine its potential effect on humans but he is not inviting visitors
to swim in or drink from it just yet."
We're just thinking out-loud here, but wouldn't this be a
great draw for his private resort rental business?
Seriously.
Maybe he hasn't considered the marketing potential of a Fountain
of Youth.
But what if you're some really rich person looking to get
out of the limelight, grab some sun and relax but you aren't addicted to
anything so rehab is unavailable?
So you've narrowed it down to two resorts.
One has turn-down service, mints on the pillow, free
mini-bar, free video games and adult films on the television, and total
seclusion. The other has all of that
plus you get to see bugs come back to life and maybe even sneak a sip of the elixir
of eternal life?
We think most rich people would go with the bug-reviving
retreat even if there is no guarantee they too would receive eternal youth by
bathing or drinking from the waters. But
maybe rich people don't care about living forever because they figure their
fame will live on and that's sufficient.
Even so, you'd think they'd want to see the bugs coming back to
life.
We're not saying Mr. Copperfield is working some marketing
angle. We're just thinking out-loud and
saying what we'd do.
David Copperfield is one hard-working guy.
He tours constantly and when he's not on the road, he's
planning or rehearsing for the next leg of his never-ending world-tour.
We often wondered how he kept up the pace. How he stayed perpetually young. We also had questions about how he does that
trick where he lasers off half his body and walks down a platform.
We have answered one of the two questions.
According to the very reliable Australian
Broadcast Company's news feed, Mr. Copperfield has found "The Fountain
of Youth."
We have broken with the stylistic requirements by referring
to the object as "The Fountain of Youth." The New York Times Manual of Style requires
any use of this phrase be in conjunction "with the arbitrary and wholly
unnecessary modifier 'proverbial.'" (27 Edition, pp. 235-236). If in fact Mr. Copperfield has found this long-sought
pool of eternal life, that's good enough for us and takes it out of the
"proverbial" category.
His little pool of perpetual personhood is located in the
southern Bahamas,
amid a cluster of four tiny islands he recently bought for $50,000,000.
(By the way, you can rent his private resort on Musha Cay
for a mere $300,000.00 a week. That's
more than we make in a month from our ads on Quinlan's Inside Magic).
"I've discovered a true phenomenon," Mr.
Copperfield said. "You can take
dead leaves, they come in contact with the water, they become full of life
again. Bugs or insects that are near death come in contact with the water,
they'll fly away."
We agree with Mr. Copperfield this "is an amazing
thing, very, very exciting."
We question whether there is a need to revive leaves and
bugs. But Mr. Copperfield knows what he
is doing.
He was once engaged to Claudia Schiffer – we've never even had Ms. Schiffer return our
phone-calls or emails or singing telegrams or sky-writing or inflatable
character messaging or flaming arrow with message attached. To be fair, though, the flaming arrow
probably wasn't the best way of communicating with the Super Model.
The crime scene investigator said once the
fire went out, the message was burned up pretty badly. Who wants to sift through still-warm embers
to discern a message from an archer with a horrible aim and apparently
inadequate personal liability insurance?
Mr. Copperfield says he has hired biologists and geologists
"to examine its potential effect on humans but he is not inviting visitors
to swim in or drink from it just yet."
We're just thinking out-loud here, but wouldn't this be a
great draw for his private resort rental business?
Seriously.
Maybe he hasn't considered the marketing potential of a Fountain
of Youth.
But what if you're some really rich person looking to get
out of the limelight, grab some sun and relax but you aren't addicted to
anything so rehab is unavailable?
So you've narrowed it down to two resorts.
One has turn-down service, mints on the pillow, free
mini-bar, free video games and adult films on the television, and total
seclusion. The other has all of that
plus you get to see bugs come back to life and maybe even sneak a sip of the elixir
of eternal life?
We think most rich people would go with the bug-reviving
retreat even if there is no guarantee they too would receive eternal youth by
bathing or drinking from the waters. But
maybe rich people don't care about living forever because they figure their
fame will live on and that's sufficient.
Even so, you'd think they'd want to see the bugs coming back to
life.
We're not saying Mr. Copperfield is working some marketing
angle. We're just thinking out-loud and
saying what we'd do.
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